I would like to think that we did right by our children when it comes to knowing the value of money. At the very young adult stage, they are both going to university and still living at home with us. While I like to think it’s because they love us so much, the reality is that it’s very expensive to live in this city, and they’re saving money by staying here rent and grocery free.
(Both of them have told us — in a nice way — that they would move out in an instant if they had the money!)
As they were growing up, we tried not to buy them too much (after the very young child stage — when we got a bit carried away with Christmas presents). At a certain point, we gave them allowance and told them they would have to buy their own toys. Their purchases were always greased with the generous birthday money that arrived from relatives. Around the age of 14, we started giving them a clothing allowance and told them that they would have to buy their own clothes (have you ever tried to buy clothes for a teenager?) When high school ended, so did their allowance.
On this topic, I was heartened to read 21 Things You Should Make Your Kids Pay For. I agree with most of it, but I chose to pay for my kids to do extracurricular activities and school travel. All of us in the family tend to be introverted and mostly would prefer to stay at home given the choice, and I wanted the kids to expand their horizons.
In terms of their university costs, we have a deal with the kids. Rather than them taking out student loans, we will lend them the money. We all sign the papers (even the kid who’s not taking out loan) so that everyone knows how much is owed. The amount is noted on our statement of net worth as an asset. So far this has resulted in minimal loans and a real commitment by them to make sure they’re getting value for their money.